Gone
by Phanstarlight
Summary: 'Menolly felt her heart stop in her chest, as though she too had just died... It couldn't be true, it just couldn't' Menolly and Sebell had both just lost one of the people closest to their hearts and neither of them was really sure how to cope. Set at the end of All The Weyrs Of Pern.


**This is my interpretation of Menolly and Sebell's reaction to Robinton's death since I will be forever bitter that we never got to see their true, full reactions.**

"It's Robinton, he's dead" That was how it began; just that one simple sentence.

Menolly felt her heart stop in her chest, as though she too had just died. She was aware of Sebell saying something beside her, probably asking what had happened, but she couldn't hear him. All she could hear were those four simple words, racing in her head. It couldn't be true, it just couldn't. Her mind and heart refused to believe it. She stumbled back and crashed against the bookcase behind her as the shock washed over her. Her hand gripped against one of the shelves, digging her nails into the wood to steady herself as Sebell rushed over and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. It wasn't until this moment that she realised she was crying. Tears cascaded down her cheeks as she turned into Sebell's arms and sobbed into his chest. He hushed her gently and stroked a hand through her hair, offering her what little comfort he could. She had no idea how long they stayed there but when she eventually lifted her head, the messenger had vanished. Silently they both agreed they needed to see Robinton and left for Landing as quickly as they could.

Menolly tensed as she walked into the Admin building, knowing what waited for them inside. Sebell did the best he could to calm her as they entered the room. Everyone turned around to look at them when they heard them enter. Jaxom, who was standing near where Robinton sat, gave Menolly a sympathetic look before moving out the way. As soon as she saw her master's body, her mind seemed to leave her. She rushed over, still not believing what her eyes were telling her. Unable to restrain herself, a loud sob bubbled up through her chest and burst from her lips as she collapsed to her knees beside him. She could feel the eyes of everyone in the room on her but she didn't care. He was really gone; the proof was right in front of her eyes. There was so much left that she had never told him, so much that he was still to do, but now that was all gone; nothing left but a cold, peacefully sleeping body. She became so caught up in her emotions that she didn't even notice people leaving the room until Sebell touched her shoulder, she turned around to look at him, and she noticed everyone else was gone.

"I... I n-need-" Menolly tried to say but Sebell hushed her gently, placing a finger against her lips.

"I know. I'll be right outside if you need me" Sebell told her before turning around and leaving the room. Menolly took a shaking breath that echoed against the metallic walls of the empty room. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment before looking up at Robinton's face once more. She opened her mouth to speak but at first, no sound came out. She looked down at the floor and bit her lip to prevent more tears following down her cheeks as she swallowed a sob. She pulled her head back up to look at Robinton again and finally started to speak.

"This doesn't feel right. Why now of all times? Why did you have to leave us now? There's still so much of this place- the place _you_ discovered- left to explore and research. There was still more I wanted to learn from you" Menolly said shakily, her hand finding its way to Robinton's and intertwining their fingers together. She tried as hard as she could to move her focus away from the fading heat in her master's hands.

"What am I to do without you?" Menolly asked before a brief smile ghosted her lips "You would probably have said something about me still having Sebell, and Lessa and F'lar, and all our friends. But that's not the same. I love them, of course I do. And I still have my music, which I adore just as much. But life without you..." Menolly trailed off, her eyes filling with tears that threatened to spill once more.

"I loved you the most. From everything in my life, you were what I treasured above all else" Menolly admitted in a whisper, praying no one but the metallic walls heard her proclamation.

"Thank you for everything" she smiled sadly, finally allowing the tears to spill down her cheeks once more. As she sobbed, Sebell- who had not gone further than two steps outside the door- found himself desperately wanting to go to Menolly and comfort her. But he knew nothing he could say or do would offer her any relief from her pain. They loved each other, there was no doubting that. And their love was pure and strong. But Sebell knew, and had always known, she could never love him the way she had loved their master. And he accepted that. Not only because he had known right from the beginning and he knew nothing would ever be able to change it (not that he would ever want to change such a thing), but because he too had loved their master. Maybe not as openly or as transparently as Menolly but the strength and passion of their love was equal in every other way.

Sebell knew Menolly would be in pieces once she finally walked out of that room. He also knew that, in time, she would regain herself- she was strong in ways many people failed to see. Until that time came, he would have to be strong for the both of them. But, for now, she was still inside that room with their master. So, for now, Sebell could abandon his strength. He collapsed to his knees with a soft thud and covered his face with his hands to muffle the sound of his cries. A deep, sharp pain slowly started to build in Sebell's stomach. His body began to shake as the full force of his loss smothered out all other thoughts. He was truly gone; after all this time, everything they had been through together. Sebell had sensed it coming but he had not wanted to believe his own instincts. But now he was forced to face the bitter truth; Robinton wasn't coming back, not this time.

Shakily, Sebell let his hands slide down his face and drop to his sides. He took a long, deep breath and pulled himself up. Quickly he brushed away the remaining tears on his face just as the door opened and Menolly stepped out. As he had expected, her eyes were red from crying and tears still clung to her face. Gently, Sebell reached out and brushed away a few of them from her cheek before dropping his hand down and slipping it into her's. He squeezed her hand softly as a sign of solidarity and she returned the gesture with a sad smile. Together the two of them walked out of the Admin building, hand in hand. As the bright sunlight hit his eyes, Sebell knew that they would be able to get through this. If Robinton had taught them anything, it was how to stay strong in times of grief and fear. And that's how he would live on- in their hearts through the love and strength he had once shown them.


End file.
